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Hey, Vance! Check him out! I can dive! Woo! Sebastian, your suit! Oh. Aaaaaah! My parents are inviting us to the summer place for the big Fourth of July weekend. I can't leave my father. This is the first summer since we have to say goodbye to your dear mother and you're going to leave me to burn the sparklers and eat the hot dogs alone! Why don't we just bring him? Nah, I don't think so. You hear this, ladies? He's worried his immigrant father's gonna make him look like some kind of goomba. Alright, listen, if we're gonna do this, Dad, you gotta dial it down with the-the-the. What all the-the-the-the? What is this? What is this? Welcome to White Oak.
Wow! This is amazing! You have these little hands here. It's called love and affection, Dad. Unlike you, when you met me at the delivery room, you chose to shake my hands. What else was I supposed to do? We just met. Sebastian, I don't know how you're gonna fit in. Where's my cheek? Where's my cheek? Where's my cheek? Mwah! Don't these people have jobs? They got their money in the stock market. That man, A's jar is buried in their backyard. I just hope nothing gets stolen this weekend, because these people love to blame the immigrants. We'll give you the grand tour. This is Doug. He's learning to be a healer. Hello. What are you doing? Just serenading our pet peacock.
Aaaaaaah! I love you. These people are strange. They are birds for pets. He's like, manly! Peacocks are just a bunch of goddamn show-offs, if you ask me. I was nervous to bring you here. But I didn't know you were gonna spend the whole time embarrassing me. How could you say that to your father? Here we go again. Everything I'm doing for you, that I've ever done for you, is for your own good. Hey, Dad! Check it out! I could die! I'm trying to make sure that you don't make an ass out of yourself by trying to be somebody you're not. Woo! Oh my God.
Oh, shit! Sebastian, your suit! It's Versace! Do you like it? Oh, you moron! It's not up! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Honey, my mom can't unsee that! I would love to make a full Italian dinner for everybody. We don't keep a lot of food here. A man of scalpel always finds a way to feed his family. Now's the time that we need. . . My father has an old Italian saying, family isn't one important thing, it's everything. I can't believe we put this all together from what we have in the kitchen. It's artichoke and poultry. Salud! Salud! Oh, no! Uggggh! I'll give a little bit of the old times. . .
You fed them their pet peacock? And you thought how he's crazy for worrying that you were gonna make us look like some bad Italian stand? You know, type! That's right. Help me get rid of the evidence. Why does it seem like you've done this before?.